THAT'S WHY WE WEAR GUMBOOTS

Well what a pack of bastards thy've got lurking in the Hutt Valley!
The Old Sheila and I've been looking at apartments in Wellington but might reconsider that now.
The Curmudgeon told me what Angry Jesus and Baxter got up to last night. Bastards! I tell you mate they wouldn't get away with that down here. Me and the boys'd shoot round to their place and boot them up the arse, swords or no bloody swords.

I know, I know, the Chair has suggested taking no direct action and as I live way down South I can't readily do anything direct but - how's this?

I can make a few phone calls to some mates up North and get a shit load - an actual shitload of cows poo delivered in a truckload to those guys address - some Grove in Nuova Lazio right?

BOOTS 'N' ALL

Well its been a battle for the last few years. Kept my head down and bum up (not what you think you perverted bastard) and just got on with it. Life on the farm is not for bloody sissies but we've managed.

We've cleared debt and expanded a bit by purchasing some neighbouring farms. We had to kick the tenants off though but hey, they would have done the same to us. We've contracted out farm management to give us more time to ourselves.

The Old sheila and I go up to Wellington a bit now, so often in fact that we bought one of those apartments on the waterfront. Flash.

The sheep farming didn't work out so we joined up with the oppo and got into dairy. Best thing we could've done. Lots of money. Have to find somewhere to put it now though.

We heard of a new enterprise named CURMUDGEONS INC. Sounds pretty good so I'll send them an E.